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HOW HEALTHY IS YOUR CHURCH? 11 questions every church need to answer.
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It is really important for us to be a part of a healthy fellowship of believers so that we can grow and mature in our relationship with the Lord. We are encouraged in scripture not to forsake the assembling of ourselves together
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HOW HEALTHY IS YOU CHURCH
The following questions come from the book: Recovering from Churches That Abuse, by Ronald Enroth, Grand Rapids, Michigan, Zondervon, 1994.
1. Does a member’s personality generally become stronger, happier, more confident as a result of contact with the group?
In an abusive church, the use of guilt, fear, and intimidation to control members is likely to produce members who have a low self-image, who feel beaten down by legalism, who have been taught that asserting oneself is
not spiritual.
One of the first disturbing characteristics to be reported by relatives and friends of members of these churches is a noticeable change in personality, usually in a negative direction.
2. Do members of the group seek to strengthen their family commitments?
Nearly all unhealthy churches attempt to minimize the commitments of their members to their family, especially parents.
Young people may be told that they now have a new “spiritual” family, complete with leaders who will “re-parent” them.
Church loyalty is seen as paramount, and family commitments are discouraged or viewed as impediments to spiritual advancement.
3. Does the group encourage independent thinking and the development of discernment skills?
Control-oriented leaders attempt to dictate what members think, although the process is so spiritualized that members usually do not realize what is going on.
A pastor or leader is viewed as God’s mouth piece, and in varying degrees a member’s decision making and ability to think for oneself are swallowed up by the group.
Pressure to conform and low tolerance for questioning make it difficult to be truly discerning.
4. Does the group allow for individual differences of belief and behavior, particularly on issues of secondary importance?
A legalistic emphasis on keeping rules and a focus on the need to stay within prescribed boundaries is always present in unhealthy spiritual environments.
Lifestyle rigidity in such groups increase a member’s guilt feelings and contributes to spiritual bondage. This rigidity is often coupled with an emphasis on beliefs that would not receive great attention in mainstream
evangelicalism.
5. Does the group encourage high moral standards both among members and between members and non members?
In intense, legalistic churches and religious organizations, the official, public proclamations usually place special value on high moral standards.
In some instances, there is a double standard between those in leadership and those in the rank and file membership.
Abusive churches tend to have incidents of sexual misconduct more often than most conventional churches; leaders sometimes exhibit an obsessive interest in matters relating to sex.
6. Does the group’s leadership invite dialogue, advice and evaluation from outside its immediate circle?
Authoritarian pastors are usually threatened by any outside expression of diverse opinions, whether from inside or outside the group. When outside speakers are given access to the pulpit, they are carefully selected to
minimize any threat to the leadership’s agenda.
Coercive pastors are fiercely independent and do not function well in a structure of accountability.
For the sake of public relations, they may boast that they are accountable to a board of some sort, when in actuality the board is composed of “yes-men” who do not question the leader’s authority.
7. Does the group allow for development in theological beliefs?
Another hallmark of an authoritarian church is its intolerance of any belief system different from its own.
They tend to measure and evaluate all forms of Christian spirituality according to their own carefully prescribed system, adopting an “us-versus-them” mentality.
8. Are group members encouraged to ask hard questions of any kind?
A cardinal rule of abusive systems is “Don’t ask questions, don’t make waves.”
A healthy pastor welcomes even tough questions. In an unhealthy church disagreement with the pastor is considered to be disloyalty and is tantamount to disobeying God.
People who repeatedly question the system are labeled “rebellious”, “unteachable”, or “disharmonious to the body of Christ”.
Persistent questioners may face sanctions of some kind such as being publicly ridiculed, shunned, shamed, humiliated, or disfellowshiped.
9. Do members appreciate truth wherever it is found even if it is outside
their group?
Whether they admit it or not, abusive churches tend to view themselves as spiritually superior to other Christian groups.
This religious elitism allows little room for outside influences. There can be no compromise with external sources, who, the leadership will say, really don’t understand what is going on in the ministry anyway.
10. Is the group honest in dealing with nonmembers, especially as it tries to win them to the group?
Sometimes abusive groups illustrate a “split-level religion”. There is one level for public presentation and another for the inner circle of membership.
The former is a carefully crafted public relations effort, the latter a reality level experienced only by the “true believers”.
Recruitment tactics are usually intense, even if they are not actually deceptive or fraudulent, they can be manipulative or exploitive.
Sometimes high pressure religious groups are evasive about there true identity: “We really don’t have a name, we’re just Christians.”
A healthy Christian group should have no qualms about revealing who it is and what its intentions are.
11. Does the group foster relationships and connections with the larger society that are more than self-serving?
First impressions are not always correct. Sustained contact with an unhealthy church, however, will usually reveal a pattern that is consistent with the characteristics we have identified.
Members will be requested to serve, to become involved, to sign up for a variety of activities that, upon closer inspection, appear to maintain the system and serve the needs of the leadership.
Abusive churches thrive on tactics that promote dependency.
Emphasizing obedience and submission to leaders, these churches often require a level of service that is overwhelming to members, resulting in emotional turmoil and spiritual breakdowns.
This video is from City on A Hill Production- River
It is a great video on how to choose a good church.
1. Does a member’s personality generally become stronger, happier, more confident as a result of contact with the group?
In an abusive church, the use of guilt, fear, and intimidation to control members is likely to produce members who have a low self-image, who feel beaten down by legalism, who have been taught that asserting oneself is
not spiritual.
One of the first disturbing characteristics to be reported by relatives and friends of members of these churches is a noticeable change in personality, usually in a negative direction.
2. Do members of the group seek to strengthen their family commitments?
Nearly all unhealthy churches attempt to minimize the commitments of their members to their family, especially parents.
Young people may be told that they now have a new “spiritual” family, complete with leaders who will “re-parent” them.
Church loyalty is seen as paramount, and family commitments are discouraged or viewed as impediments to spiritual advancement.
3. Does the group encourage independent thinking and the development of discernment skills?
Control-oriented leaders attempt to dictate what members think, although the process is so spiritualized that members usually do not realize what is going on.
A pastor or leader is viewed as God’s mouth piece, and in varying degrees a member’s decision making and ability to think for oneself are swallowed up by the group.
Pressure to conform and low tolerance for questioning make it difficult to be truly discerning.
4. Does the group allow for individual differences of belief and behavior, particularly on issues of secondary importance?
A legalistic emphasis on keeping rules and a focus on the need to stay within prescribed boundaries is always present in unhealthy spiritual environments.
Lifestyle rigidity in such groups increase a member’s guilt feelings and contributes to spiritual bondage. This rigidity is often coupled with an emphasis on beliefs that would not receive great attention in mainstream
evangelicalism.
5. Does the group encourage high moral standards both among members and between members and non members?
In intense, legalistic churches and religious organizations, the official, public proclamations usually place special value on high moral standards.
In some instances, there is a double standard between those in leadership and those in the rank and file membership.
Abusive churches tend to have incidents of sexual misconduct more often than most conventional churches; leaders sometimes exhibit an obsessive interest in matters relating to sex.
6. Does the group’s leadership invite dialogue, advice and evaluation from outside its immediate circle?
Authoritarian pastors are usually threatened by any outside expression of diverse opinions, whether from inside or outside the group. When outside speakers are given access to the pulpit, they are carefully selected to
minimize any threat to the leadership’s agenda.
Coercive pastors are fiercely independent and do not function well in a structure of accountability.
For the sake of public relations, they may boast that they are accountable to a board of some sort, when in actuality the board is composed of “yes-men” who do not question the leader’s authority.
7. Does the group allow for development in theological beliefs?
Another hallmark of an authoritarian church is its intolerance of any belief system different from its own.
They tend to measure and evaluate all forms of Christian spirituality according to their own carefully prescribed system, adopting an “us-versus-them” mentality.
8. Are group members encouraged to ask hard questions of any kind?
A cardinal rule of abusive systems is “Don’t ask questions, don’t make waves.”
A healthy pastor welcomes even tough questions. In an unhealthy church disagreement with the pastor is considered to be disloyalty and is tantamount to disobeying God.
People who repeatedly question the system are labeled “rebellious”, “unteachable”, or “disharmonious to the body of Christ”.
Persistent questioners may face sanctions of some kind such as being publicly ridiculed, shunned, shamed, humiliated, or disfellowshiped.
9. Do members appreciate truth wherever it is found even if it is outside
their group?
Whether they admit it or not, abusive churches tend to view themselves as spiritually superior to other Christian groups.
This religious elitism allows little room for outside influences. There can be no compromise with external sources, who, the leadership will say, really don’t understand what is going on in the ministry anyway.
10. Is the group honest in dealing with nonmembers, especially as it tries to win them to the group?
Sometimes abusive groups illustrate a “split-level religion”. There is one level for public presentation and another for the inner circle of membership.
The former is a carefully crafted public relations effort, the latter a reality level experienced only by the “true believers”.
Recruitment tactics are usually intense, even if they are not actually deceptive or fraudulent, they can be manipulative or exploitive.
Sometimes high pressure religious groups are evasive about there true identity: “We really don’t have a name, we’re just Christians.”
A healthy Christian group should have no qualms about revealing who it is and what its intentions are.
11. Does the group foster relationships and connections with the larger society that are more than self-serving?
First impressions are not always correct. Sustained contact with an unhealthy church, however, will usually reveal a pattern that is consistent with the characteristics we have identified.
Members will be requested to serve, to become involved, to sign up for a variety of activities that, upon closer inspection, appear to maintain the system and serve the needs of the leadership.
Abusive churches thrive on tactics that promote dependency.
Emphasizing obedience and submission to leaders, these churches often require a level of service that is overwhelming to members, resulting in emotional turmoil and spiritual breakdowns.
This video is from City on A Hill Production- River
It is a great video on how to choose a good church.
Discussion Forum
A HEALTHY CHURCH 2 Replies
Started by Bob B. Last reply by Bob B Oct. 28, 2008.
CHURCH DISIPLINE
Started by Bob B Apr. 20, 2008.
NET SUPPORT FOR THOSE WHO HAVE EXPEARENCED SPIRITUAL ABUSE 3 Replies
Started by Bob B. Last reply by Bob B Apr. 13, 2008.
Comment Wall
Comment
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Comment by mary jamieson on July 14, 2008 at 8:48am - once a loverly christian friend said to me if i find a perfect church as soon as i walk into it, it woul become inperfect, i would pray for all the children God and all the believers of the Lord Jesus to strenghend in the inner man women to know the mind of christ jesus in all situations amen
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Comment by Bob B on May 19, 2008 at 6:51pm -
We all need to make sure that the church which we are apart of is always to help and benifit familes and never the other way around. A church should fuel families, strengthen, and support them and as this happens families get stronger and so does the church.
We need to choose a church carefully and thoughtfully and not just go to a church because maybe it is where you feel obligated because of family ties.
If you have children and you go to a church that neglects ministering to children, you are in the wrong church. It is important for to be in a good stable church and not church hop because this is very un healthy for children who form close relationships and can hurt them by moving around.
Some times it can't be helped due to the fact churches can become unhealthy.
Un healthy families should grow to be a more healthy in a setting that foster spiritual and emotional health in families.
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Comment by Bob B on April 16, 2008 at 9:37am
- It is a good thing to evaluate out lives, our families, and our churches to see if we are any where close to being biblical. To ask these questions and be honest in our answers can really revolutionize our lives, our families and our churches.
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Comment by Bob B on April 10, 2008 at 6:41am
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Donna's Post; Healing Churches VS Toxic churches is a really good.
If you read through my story (Healing those who have gone through spiritual abuse) I talked about the toxic church I was a part of.
I felt like I was fuel to keep the machine (church) going. The toxic system exploited my gifts, my talents, and the best parts of me for itself.
When ever a church gets to the point where it becomes big business and the people are assets, then that church needs to close its doors because all it will do is exploit and hurt its members.
A church is supposed to support, strengthen, and help families. It is never to become a business for the purpose of making money for those who are consumed with greed.
If the Church of Jesus Christ will stop being so tolerant with abusive churches, and organizations like this, and stop being so co-dependant, then we can see the church really begin to emerge as the bride of Christ without spot or wrinkle.
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Comment by Inderias Dominic Bhatti on April 5, 2008 at 2:22am
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Dear Bob,
Thank you Bob for the questions that come from the book: Recovering from Churches That Abuse, by Ronald Enroth, Grand Rapids, Michigan, Zondervon, 1994 (How Healthy is your Church). They are much inspiring to me and my wife who serve as a co – pastor with me in our ministry.
As most of our ministry board members do not know English so we feel the need to translate it into Urdu for them.
I am much sure that this would bless us all while having the examination of our conscious.
I would come up with their reflections and feed back tomorrow.
May I humbly ask you to send me this book on our postal address: Pastor Inderias Dominic Bhatti, 94 Saroba Garden, Ferozpur Road, Nishtar Town, Lahore – 54760, PAKISTAN.
The second request is that I would love to translate this Book in our national language “URDU”. I am much sure that this would bless us and the churches in Pakistan both for having the examination of conscious as well as to gain and growth in our Lord Jesus. So please ask the permission from Rev. Ronald Enroth about it.
I am sorry to be in a hurry because it is raining heavily and as we worship in a rented ground with tents and mattresses and the place has become muddy and I have to find the alternate of tomorrows’ service.
God Bless,
In seeking your prayers, I am,
Pastor Inderias
Laore,
PAKISTAN
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Comment by angie on April 2, 2008 at 2:21pm - Thank you so much for these insightful questions. I am glad that someone has spoken up. In Christ Angie
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