week 1--Replace a Complaining Attitude ....

[Carla]

Discussion Questions

1. James MacDonald says that God hears, hates and judges our complaining. Why does God hate our complaining?

2. What can we learn from the biblical examples used? How can we apply them to life today?

3. Should people accept their lot in life, work to change it, or some combination of the two?

Do you have a complaining attitude? This weeks study will delve into Scripture and help you to apply biblical truths to your life to see if you are a complainer and, if so, what can you do about it?

Memory Verse:
"Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world," Philipians 2:14-15

In the short term, complaining separates us from God, in the long term it becomes a lifestyle that sends us to the wildreness.~James MacDonald.

Do you agree or disagree with the following:
1. Complaining drains your energy and affects your outlook on life.
2. Complaining moves you forward in decisive decision making.
3. It's easier to complain then to decide what to do and then do it.
4. Complaining is a good way to let your dissatisfaction be heard.
5, Complaining feels good.
6. Complaining is a way of avoiding taking action.
7. Sometimes a situation merits complaints.
8. Complaining keeps you from doing anything positive.
9. I only complain to help someone understand my perspective.
10. I complain more when I feel ___fill in the blank_____
11. I complain less when I feel _________fill in the blank____

definition of complaining:
Complaining is to express dissatisfaction with a circumstance which is not wrong and about which I am not doing anything to correct.

Are any of these circumstances complaining in light of our definition:

1.. Asking your small group leader if the group could consistently dismiss on time since your babysitter needs to be home by a disignated hour.

2.. Asking your spouse what he or she does all day, why the house isn't picked up or why the chores didn't get done over the weekend.

3.. Sulking because you don;t like the way your friend is behaving...but when your friend asks you what is wrong, you respond with 'nothing'.

4.. Asking the waiter to cook your steak a little more because it is rare and you asked for well done.

5.. Telling your friends and family how you hate this restaurant because they never cook the food the way you like it.

Is complaining a Sin?

[MandyJ]

Hi. I don't have the book yet, but I need to go out and get it. It sounds like an interesting book. It is also a great way to remind us how important it is to be thankful for what we have in our own lives. Just from looking at the questions you posted above, I have to say that I think God doesn't like it when we complain because it makes us look and sound like we have an ungrateful heart. There are many people in the world, especially in those countries that have starving people, etc.. that would love to have many of the things that we complain about. For instance, some complain about their work or about not having a big enough house to live in. I too have been guilty of these types of complaints, though I don't like to admit it. I think we all need to realize that God puts us where we are for a reason, and even though we may not like some of the situations we have to face, He has a plan for all of us. After all, we are the clay. How the Master potter molds us is His perogative. It can be hard to be molded, but God does do it for our own good and to bring glory to Himself as well.

I think we have a choice about how we look at the things that happen in our lives. We can choose to be negative and grumbling, or we can choose to try to see what we are meant to take away from what we are going through. I do believe our attitudes can drag us down too. I mean how can being constantly negative help anyone? It can't. While I myself have a hard time being positive all the time, I know that when I have negative thoughts those are the times I need to pray or read my Bible the most. God picks us up if we let Him.

I have heard that we can be our own worst enemies. I think that is true. Sometimes we need a different perspective in order to see what we should be focusing on. When it comes down to it, it should be God.

[mark]

I feel complaining gives you an out. Complain grumble feeling sad gives you the attitude that you can't do anything about it. You keep searching and keeping faith in God anything is possible. Jesus never complained look what He went through. What we are going through in life is nothing compared to what he went through. I know if we keep our focus on what Jesus went through. Our problems are insignificant. For we are all human complaining is part of life we all do it. Just REMEMBER what our SAVIOR went through. Mark

[MaryAnn]

Hey there Carla. Thanks for this timely reminder. I have read and studied James' book, yet still get caught up in 'complaining'. I am thinking about a book I read many years ago before I knew the Lord, by Dale Carnegie "How to Win Friends and Influence People". He advised to never criticize, condemn, complain...which he referred to as the 3 C's...

We are quite comical creatures as to how quickly we fall into this pattern of criticizing, condemning & complaining. It's not really comical, but we might as well laugh at ourselves, and go ahead with making new choices when the 3 C's try to take first place in our lives.

Several days ago I went with 5 others to a city nearby (2 hours both ways), bumpy ride, heavy traffic, etc. We stayed much longer than I expected, and I was waiting for the others several hours to return home. I was hungry, cold and tired. So you can imagine my old friend "complaining" was right there to keep me company, and to justify my feelings. I was not even complaining out loud, but my quietness displayed my displeasure.

It's a struggle! But we keep going, and don't let the enemy condemn us when we go off track... we just get back on track through confession & forgiveness, and remember that Jesus is growing us up.

God bless all of you!
MaryAnn

[Carla]

Thank you Mom for this reminder...Always confession and forgiveness..and that Jesus is growing us up....Thankfully, He will not let us go. Praise God!

[newborinquen69]

I think that God does want to hear our complaints but in a humble manner remembering his sovereignty and kingship. In lamentations speak of a time of deep grievance and sorrow, in Job, him and his friends did nothing but gave their assumptions about why tragedies were happening and complained but in all of this God waits to the end when we finally give ourselves to his will to reply to our most agonizing questions. I have found that complaining can really hurt and wrongly influence others when we don't acknowledge our resentment and bitterness to him and are constantly pouring our ill emotions and dissatisfaction unto others.I have known God to be a caring Father who always wants to know how I feel and make it right.

[Roxliverpoolfan]

Yes it is It makes God very angry